BLOG

"What The..?!" Wednesdays – Moms Don't Work That Hard

 design-10

Yesterday I regrettably stumbled on this post on the Internet, “Stay At Home Moms Don’t Work That Hard.” Yes, it’s written by a man. No, it’s not a humor piece, although I had to read it through more than once to be sure. The article is full of helpful suggestions for husbands to hold their lazy wives accountable, such as making her keep a journal of everything she does throughout the day, and leave her with to-do lists “and make it clear that you expected it to be completed every day.” Here’s a choice excerpt:

The most disgusting part about this to me is that I hear my these stay at home moms bragging about this to no end.  Yet, they still hamsterize that they are somehow working harder and longer than their husbands.  They also never acknowledge that the stress of the full-time workforce is far more intense than being a stay at home mom.  While their husband is being chewed out by his boss, their biggest worry of the day is not burning the lasagna (assuming they can cook).

I guess I just had to share with you, my readers, so you can join me in my indignation. As I clicked a couple more links on the “Return of Kings” website, I realized it’s a homophobic, sexist hate club, which made me easily write them off as The Crazies. But still, there are people who actually think like this. And while this post is an exaggerated view, I think it is a sentiment that many people secretly carry to some degree. But let’s be honest. Who cares what ignorant people think. We don’t need to defend ourselves to them. 

I personally know and appreciate how hard my husband works, and I don’t pretend that my “work day” is as strenuous as manual labor or as stressful as corporate America. But I do know that being a stay-at-home mom is a lot more challenging than not burning dinner. (Although, if you’re like me, that is quite a challenge in itself.)

Thoughts?

Because I feel icky even linking up to that post, I also thought I’d share with you a few other happy links that I’ve enjoyed reading this week. 

“Margarita Mommies” shared this sweet story of a 61-year-old woman who gave birth to her own grandchild. Sounds freaky, but it’s really worth reading. 

Also, Joy over at “A Deeper Story” wrote this honest, touching essay about the heart of the parent/child relationship. She talks about how much happier and at peace we would all be if we told our children – and our parents – that we are proud of them. Here’s an excerpt:

I think maybe some of strain on the relationships between parents and their adult children could originate in a mutual desire to be approved of, appreciated, and loved for who we are, in spite of our mistakes and weaknesses.

I don’t think I’ve ever said it before. Mom and dad, I’m proud of you. You did the best you could, and you did a good job.

That’s it for “What The…?!” Wednesday. Talk to you tomorrow. 

share:

10 Comments

  1. Andrea on November 13, 2013 at 10:33 pm

    Yikes! That guy is CRAZY. Haha!

    • creatingmom on November 20, 2013 at 11:28 pm

      Right? He’s like a neo-nazi of sexism.

  2. Andrea on November 13, 2013 at 10:33 pm

    Yikes! That guy is CRAZY. Haha!

  3. Lauren Markman on November 14, 2013 at 7:21 am

    I don’t even want to comment on the icky guy – let’s just move on to the nicer articles. I’ve been telling my son that I am proud of him more often (http://ididntlisten.blogspot.com/2013/10/mom-says-she-is-proud-of-me.html), but I will have to make sure to tell my parents that I am proud of them, too. Thanks!

    • creatingmom on November 20, 2013 at 11:29 pm

      I know, I don’t often think about it going both directions. Your words for your mom on your blog are so sweet. I always enjoy reading.

  4. Rachael Gelsinger on November 19, 2013 at 3:28 pm

    So I’ve been thinking about the article you posted by that clearly disturbed guy…I even went and read the article in its full context partly because I couldn’t believe someone would write that without even a hint of sarcasm. I came away enraged and feeling icky. But the thing that bothered me the most is how it affected my sense of self. Long after I read the article, I found myself examining my days and asking myself, “Did I work hard enough today? Is Nathan really working more than I am? Is what I do really worth it?” What I realized after some thought is that this isn’t an issue of time worked but of value. Even if Nathan works more hours than I do and I enjoy the occasional, relaxing P.J. day, it doesn’t make my job as a mom any less important. So go ahead. Make me punch a time clock and record my activities….that’s not where I find my worth and I refuse to give into that mentality. So rather than be mad, I decided to feel sorry for someone who is not only selfish and unloving towards his poor wife, but also desperately insecure. Marriage and childrearing is a partnership not a competition.

    • creatingmom on November 20, 2013 at 11:25 pm

      YES! Partnership, not a competition. Couldn’t have said it better. We can be thankful for how hard our husbands work but we don’t have to feel GUILTY … Thanks for your thoughts.

  5. Rachael Gelsinger on November 19, 2013 at 3:28 pm

    So I’ve been thinking about the article you posted by that clearly disturbed guy…I even went and read the article in its full context partly because I couldn’t believe someone would write that without even a hint of sarcasm. I came away enraged and feeling icky. But the thing that bothered me the most is how it affected my sense of self. Long after I read the article, I found myself examining my days and asking myself, “Did I work hard enough today? Is Nathan really working more than I am? Is what I do really worth it?” What I realized after some thought is that this isn’t an issue of time worked but of value. Even if Nathan works more hours than I do and I enjoy the occasional, relaxing P.J. day, it doesn’t make my job as a mom any less important. So go ahead. Make me punch a time clock and record my activities….that’s not where I find my worth and I refuse to give into that mentality. So rather than be mad, I decided to feel sorry for someone who is not only selfish and unloving towards his poor wife, but also desperately insecure. Marriage and childrearing is a partnership not a competition.

    • creatingmom on November 20, 2013 at 11:25 pm

      YES! Partnership, not a competition. Couldn’t have said it better. We can be thankful for how hard our husbands work but we don’t have to feel GUILTY … Thanks for your thoughts.

Leave a Comment