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The Ten Commandments of a stay-at-home mom

As I mentioned in yesterday’s post, I need to set some rules to make this mom thing work. So quickly, while Baby G is napping, I will give to you the Ten Commandments of my new stay-at-home mom life.

Unlike the real Ten Commandments, these are not God-inspired or written in stone. And also, unlike the real Ten Commandments, these are subjective and can vary between mother and household. Here are mine.

1. Thou shall not go braless all day.
Yes, I know there is the issue of access for nursing moms, but it’s not that difficult unsnap a bra every couple of hours. Wearing a bra for a few hours in the afternoon is good enough for full credit.

2. Thou shall wake up early.
This might sound really basic to you guys, but I’m more of a night owl, so sometimes it’s hard for me to wake up in the morning, as I wrote about yesterday. I feel so much better the mornings I wake up with the sun.

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3. Thou shall continue to read the news
I’m going to make my homepage the New York Times website so at the very least, I’ll see the major headlines of the day. Motherhood can be a very isolating experience, and I don’t want to be so inwardly focused that I stop caring about what is going on in the world.

4. Thou shall go to play dates or library story time at least once a week, even when thou is feeling anti-social.
It is pretty easy for me to spend time alone (or in this case, with a tiny human), and the more I do that, the harder it is for me to be around others. But after I’ve marinated in myself for so long, I get weirdAnd then I venture out to a play group, where the weirdness drips off me. I say weird things, get weird looks, and get pushed further back in my comfortable shell.

5. Thou shall get dressed in real clothes everyday. Thou shall embrace stretchy pants and TOMS as real clothes.
No, I won’t be vacuuming in pearls. But I will try to wear comfortable, real clothing as often as I can.

5 1/2. Thou shall make time to eat. Thou shall count protein shakes as eating but  thou must also incorporate one real meal per day.
This one is tough for me. Sometimes I’ll realize it’s 4 p.m. and I haven’t eaten anything. I’m so busy feeding the Girl that I forget to feed myself. I have protein powder on hand for a quick fix, but also will try to eat real food when possible.

6. Thou shall drop any project, blogging included, to spend time on the floor with the Lovebug.
I can get very focused and I don’t break my focus easily. So I’m telling myself that when Baby G is making adorable eyes at me, and I’m “busy” blogging, or making dinner, or cleaning, I will stop what I am doing to spend time with her. Because that is the whole point of this whole staying at home thing.

7. Thou shall thank God for the blessing staying at home is, and when complaining or grumbling, remember this. 
On the days that Baby G is cranky, when I’m longing for adult interaction and I can’t wash the stinky diaper smell off my hands, I will remember how blessed I am to be able to do this.

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8. Thou shall allow the house to get messy, but not so messy that harmony cannot be found within its walls.
I will live by my favorite mantra, “A clean house is a sign of a wasted life,” but I will also not let the house get so bad that Baby G’s world feels chaotic and out of control.

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9. Thou shall not apologize to people for thou’s choice to stay home. Conversly, thou shall never refer to thine self as a “Full-Time Mom,” for this is offensive to working moms.
I remember a few months back, when I still worked at the newspaper, a lady at church asked me if I was a “full-time mom,” and what she wanted to know by that is whether I worked outside the home. How was I supposed to answer that? On the flip side, I will not apologize to anyone ignorant who might assume being a stay-at-home mom involves a lot of day time TV and laying around. I have nothing to prove to that person. 

 

10. Thou shall have grace for thou self and others. 
I am not a perfect parent and never will be. I’m not a supermom, nor do I want to be. I just will love the children that I am given the best way I know how. And when I fall short, I will forgive myself. I will offer this grace to other moms who are pretending to be supermoms, and maybe their front will crumble and we can all just be humble and accept each other. And if they maintain their front, they will bug me very much but I will love them anyways.

Another blogger, Laura from The Things I Said I’d Never Do, crafted her own list of Ten Commandments, which are different from mine. She’s funnier than me too, so check out her journey to becoming a “non Pinterest” stay-at-home mom.  Who doesn’t love some honest, old fashioned self-depricating humor?

So what are your Ten Commandments? Do they differ from mine greatly? Also curious to hear from working moms. What are your Ten Commandments?

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13 Comments

  1. ImperfectAnna on October 8, 2013 at 3:25 pm

    Found your blog through our Birth Board. I have to laugh at these Ten Commandments because I became a SAHM when my little girl was born and I know exactly what you are talking about. My commandments are probably almost all the same. Except I already always wear a (nursing) bra, can’t stand not wearing one.

    I am into blogging and I started a new one while waiting for my little to arrive, but you know how it goes and I haven’t done much in a long while. I’ve been trying to get back into blogging more. Hopefully we can be friends on this journey together, espeically since I also have to work on the social commandment here, too!

    • creatingmom on October 8, 2013 at 3:31 pm

      Hi there, Anna. Thanks so much for stopping by from the birth board. I figured there was some bloggers out there I could connect with. I know, it is so hard to commit to blogging consistently. I’d love to be e-friends and support each other through our blogs.

  2. ImperfectAnna on October 8, 2013 at 3:25 pm

    Found your blog through our Birth Board. I have to laugh at these Ten Commandments because I became a SAHM when my little girl was born and I know exactly what you are talking about. My commandments are probably almost all the same. Except I already always wear a (nursing) bra, can’t stand not wearing one.

    I am into blogging and I started a new one while waiting for my little to arrive, but you know how it goes and I haven’t done much in a long while. I’ve been trying to get back into blogging more. Hopefully we can be friends on this journey together, espeically since I also have to work on the social commandment here, too!

    • creatingmom on October 8, 2013 at 3:31 pm

      Hi there, Anna. Thanks so much for stopping by from the birth board. I figured there was some bloggers out there I could connect with. I know, it is so hard to commit to blogging consistently. I’d love to be e-friends and support each other through our blogs.

  3. Lauren Markman on October 9, 2013 at 5:42 am

    I love that you have two #5s on this list and that they are both about taking care of yourself. There is some beauty to that. For as much as we love our little ones, we moms have to remember to take care of ourselves as well. A well-cared for mommy is a better mommy to her children!

    • creatingmom on October 9, 2013 at 8:30 am

      HA,yes that was, totally on purpose… *cough* . But yes, one thing that’s for sure is that if I don’t make a point to take care of myself, the day will slip away from me and I won’t have eaten, showered, etc. Easier said than done though, isn’t it?

  4. Paula W on October 18, 2013 at 11:29 pm

    #5 is hard for me. I live in my jammies most days and jay comes home asking, you’re not even dressed? And then I get the “what did you do all day?” And then I glare. I’m at least trying now. Beginning to at least get dressed and brush my teeth. Makeup & Shower optional.

    Making time to eat is another tricky one, I need to get me some of those protein bars.

    • creatingmom on October 20, 2013 at 7:48 pm

      I guess you could just not get dressed at all and be naked when he gets home. 😉

  5. Paula W on October 18, 2013 at 11:29 pm

    #5 is hard for me. I live in my jammies most days and jay comes home asking, you’re not even dressed? And then I get the “what did you do all day?” And then I glare. I’m at least trying now. Beginning to at least get dressed and brush my teeth. Makeup & Shower optional.

    Making time to eat is another tricky one, I need to get me some of those protein bars.

    • creatingmom on October 20, 2013 at 7:48 pm

      I guess you could just not get dressed at all and be naked when he gets home. 😉

  6. […] the day, me never getting out of my PJs and forgetting to eat until 5:30 p.m., (breaking two of my stay-at-home mom commandments) and her fussing around, needing me at her […]

  7. […] the day, me never getting out of my PJs and forgetting to eat until 5:30 p.m., (breaking two of my stay-at-home mom commandments) and her fussing around, needing me at her […]

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